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one woman's journey of self-discovery, weight loss, and taking back control

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Second Chances

Life often presents opportunities that seem very appealing, yet for whatever reason we often let those opportunities pass by without taking advantage.  For some of us we pass because we're shy, afraid of change, afraid to fail, etc.  For me it was about how I felt about myself.  I knew I didn't look the way I wanted to look. I felt afraid to put myself out there and be rejected.  I'm sure I missed out on a lot of things because I was afraid for people to see me.  I stayed home...in my comfort zone...and became more miserable.

While I have made amazing strides, I'm still not one hundred percent comfortable with myself.  I'm learning to get rid of the negative language, stop putting myself down, and just feel good with where I am at the moment.  I know that I'm not stuck here forever, and I know now that I am able to make the changes I need to make and get to where I want to be.

Today was a big day for me.  Some of you may appreciate this, and some of you may think I'm crazy...but I wore a sleeveless shirt today...in public.  I know that seems so insignificant, but for me it was a HUGE step in feeling better about myself.  The last time I wore something sleeveless in public was on my honeymoon in Mexico 13 years ago.  I remember carrying a sweater with me because I felt so self conscious about it even then.

Ok...now that I have completely sidetracked from where I was going with this post....back on topic.  Have you ever had an acquaintance that you really wished you could get to know better?  Someone who you feel connected to in some way or seems like they might be a nice person to spend time with?  I know so many people like that...and for years I was afraid to take the first step in getting closer to people.  It's sad that I could have missed out on some amazing friendships that God had planted right in front of me.  However, sometimes, you get a second chance.  Today I had one of those happy tears/goosebump moments when I realized that I had in fact missed out on one of those opportunities in the past, but was given a second chance.  It is so amazing to me how people are brought into your life.  Had I not been through this amazing journey over the past year, I may have missed out a second time.  New friends are always a good thing.  New friends that share your vision, your dreams, and understand where you've been are a rare blessing.  Today I'm thankful for rare blessings.

Friday, May 25, 2012

Weigh In Day

So happy to report my stats from the past week.  Since last Friday, I have lost exactly 5 pounds! I also managed to lose 1 inch from my upper chest, 1 inch from my waist, and 1 inch from my hips.  So glad I talked to my coach last Friday! The plateau has been broken....time to focus on the big 100!

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

The Inevitable Plateau

With weight loss almost everyone experiences the dreaded plateau.  I, unfortunately, have been experiencing it in a big way.  

For me it was a gradual slow down in my weight loss at first. I made it through the holidays just fine and managed to lose 4 pounds between Thanksgiving and Christmas...so I was pretty happy about that.  When the New Year hit and everyone was making their resolutions to get healthy, I was already well on my way.  I hit the 50 pound mark right after the start of 2012.  That was HUGE for me because the most I have ever been able to lose on any of the other diets I've tried was 30 pounds.  

In February, I was shocked to discover that I was pregnant.  I used that as an excuse to get off track with my program quite a bit, but actually didn't gain any weight.  Unfortunately, the pregnancy ended in miscarriage in early March.  I was obviously devastated, but recovered emotionally much quicker than I expected I would.  The physical recovery was longer and way more painful than I expected it would be.  By the middle of March, I was going up and down between the 55 and 60 pound mark...and that is where I have been stuck!  I gain five, lose five....the same five over and over and it's frustrating and discouraging...but I am determined and refuse to be defeated! 

At the beginning of April, I decided to get more serious about keeping track of my food intake to hopefully break the plateau.  I started using a calorie tracker on my phone.  I stuck within my calories for the most part for a whole month (minus a couple of "cheat" days).  After a month of using the program I was down a whopping 1.2 pounds.  Plus, I was hungry the whole time!  Obviously, something wasn't right.

The best part about Herbalife is the support system.  Everyone who starts a program has a personal wellness coach.  Their job is to help you get started and to support you in any way that you need.  My coach is amazing...she is always very encouraging and pushes me when I need to be pushed.  However, coaches are not mind readers! :)  Sometimes I forget that all I have to do is ask for a little help!  I spend quite a bit of time with my coach since we work at the Nutrition Club together.  She noticed that something was off with me and called me out...so I told her about how I was struggling.  We went through my numbers, and while I was sticking within my calorie range, I wasn't getting near enough protein.  So, she took my weight and measurements then wrote out a plan for me to get the protein that I need.  For my body composition, I need to consume about 125 grams of protein a day.  

Protein is a HUGE component in weight loss because first of all it keeps you satisfied, but it also provides fuel for your body.  I was eating a lot of calories, but they were packed with empty nutrition and not the things my body needs.  Most fad diets concentrate on getting pounds off as quickly as possible.  Unfortunately, the pounds you take off are usually water and muscle which increases your body fat percentage and decreases your lean body mass.  Because Herbalife focuses on nutrition, we learn to feed our bodies the things that it needs and weight loss is almost like a side effect of that.  Its a difficult thing for a lot of people to do (including myself) but we need to learn to stop focusing so much on the number on the scale and more on the important numbers like body fat percentage, lean body mass, and resting metabolic rate.  The truth is, we often lose inches before we lose pounds. (I even managed to lose another pants size in the midst of my plateau) We keep a close eye on our important numbers through a scan machine that we use which I love because even when I'm not losing pounds, I can keep track of whether or not my other numbers are improving.

So, long story short, (this post ended up being WAY longer than I planned) that was last Friday.  I have been instructed to stay away from the scale for a week.  I am sticking to counting my protein intake and not focusing as much on calories.  On Friday of this week I will be measured and weighed and I WILL have something good to report.  How do I know? Because I feel SO much better, I haven't been hungry, and I am having a positive attitude about it.  So, check back and I'll report my progress for the week!

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Side by Side

Thanks to a sweet friend, Maggie, for creating this side by side picture for me.  I can't wait to have her update it as I continue to shrink.  I am overwhelmed with the encouraging words and kind comments about my blog.  I hope to be updating it frequently with more success stories!  You can see more of Maggie's talent on her blog http://magsgraphics.blogspot.com/  Thanks, again, Mags!

Monday, May 14, 2012

Catching up on a year gone by....

Funny.  I forgot about this blog that I started over a year ago on my journey to be a better me.  The thought crossed my mind today and I just read my very first post.  It takes me back.  Back to a place I never want to be again.  I was in the midst of one of those "what am I here for" moments...well, more like eras of my life.  I felt very deeply and very strongly that God did not waste his time on me so that I could live my life parenting from the couch.  While I was blessed immeasurably, I was miserable with myself.  I had a deep sense of purpose that I couldn't seem to find through all of my layers.  I prayed daily for God to show me what he had in mind for me.  Ironically enough...while I didn't continue my blog...I did continue my journey to self improvement.  Its a long story, but I've been longing to write it down, so here it is.

Since January 2011 when I weighed myself and realized that I had reached a point where I swore I would never allow myself to go, I knew something had to change.  I went back to the weight loss group that I had been a part of off and on for years hoping to keep myself accountable.  I started losing weight....slowly, but I was losing, so I felt pretty good about it.  I was pretty consistent for the next few months and started getting more serious about making some changes...hence the previous post.

Then, in May of 2011 we decided to take "before" pictures for our weight loss group so we could monitor our progress visually.  I thought I was looking pretty good at that point...I wore some of my most flattering clothes and made sure my hair and makeup looked nice.  I posed for my picture and this is what came out:

I was horrified at how I looked.  It took everything in me not to break down and cry at that very second.  That was probably the lowest point for me.

A couple of weeks later, I was driving through a small nearby town on the way to my mom's house.  I drove down this very road many times before.  Along this route was a little flower shop and they had a sign out front with the words "Be the Next Biggest Loser - Get Paid to Lose Weight" followed by a phone number.  I had seen this very sign several times and paid it little attention...but this day was different.  It was June 2, 2011.  I decided to call the number...what did I have to lose besides some weight?  The phone rang.  It rang and rang....then I got someone's voice mail....I chickened out and hung up - slightly relieved that I didn't have to follow through with the crazy idea - and continued on my drive.  Not five minutes had passed when my phone rang and the phone number displayed on the caller ID was the number I had just called.  I reluctantly answered.  Michelle was on the other end and explained to me briefly how the Weight Loss Challenge works.  I agreed to meet her at her Nutrition Club on the following Monday.

Fast forward to Monday afternoon, June 6.  I was at a friend's house and mentioned that I was considering checking out this Weight Loss Challenge but was a little nervous.  I had a feeling that this challenge was in some way affiliated with Herbalife products.  I was in NO way interested in taking the products at all.  I knew nothing about them, but knew they weren't for me.  She offered to go with me for support...besides, she wanted to lose a few pounds.

That evening we walked into a cute little yellow house with a purple porch along the local bike trail.  The place is called Vibe Nutrition.  I was carrying with me a ton of negativity about what would follow.  I was very reluctant, extremely skeptical, and immediately defensive when I saw the "Herbalife" banner inside.  I sighed and knew this wouldn't last.

We were greeted by Michelle (whom I had talked to on the phone) and Jen - the owners of Vibe.  We signed up for the challenge, got all of the information, paid our fee, got weighed and measured, and had our picture taken. Then they gave us some Aloe and Tea to drink and a Smoothie.  This is what I looked like that first night:

Yikes! I'm not really sure what ever possessed me to think that shirt was a wise choice! haha

Anyway...the challenge was supposed to last 9 weeks, so my goal was to lose 20 pounds.  Michelle wanted me to schedule something called a Metabolism Profile with her, so I went back the next day.  My first question to her was "Do I have to take these  products to be in the Challenge?" I, of course, did not, so I was relieved. She hooked some wires up to my hand and foot, asked me a bunch of questions, and told me what my "magic numbers" were.  I learned my BMI, my resting metabolic rate, my lean body mass, my target weight, ideal caloric and protein intake, and more.  I was not at all surprised by my numbers.  None of them were good...but I was surprised to learn that my metabolism was actually pretty high.

The challenge had been going on for a few weeks and I was losing consistently, but not as much as I wanted to.  I was still very self-conscious, shy, and withdrawn in the group, while the people who were "on products" seemed so happy and outgoing all the time.  They were also losing 4 or 5 pounds a week while I was losing maybe 1.  I decided that I needed to do something more and I wanted to try taking the products to see how things would go.  After a lot of convincing, my husband agreed to not only let me try the products, but to receive a discount by purchasing a 5 month supply of products.  I wanted to be sure that I would stick with it for more than a month, so I signed up as a distributor for the discount...making it very clear to Michelle that I in no way would ever have any interest in doing the business whatsoever.  So, on July 5, 2011 I started on an Ultimate program.

My first week on the products, I dropped 6 pounds, so I was thrilled...especially since I had only lost 6 pounds in the rest of the entire challenge.  But more importantly than that, I felt so much better.  I wasn't tired and sluggish all the time.  I couldn't explain it other than to say I just "feel good".  My family were the first to notice the change in me....not my weight, but my overall attitude and demeanor.  I was a much happier, more positive person.  By the end of the challenge, I had lost 12 pounds (not quite the 20 I had hoped for) but more importantly, I was down 29 inches!  I won the cash prize for the most inches lost in the group.

I kept joining challenge after challenge and was dropping weight and inches at a pretty good rate.  I started coming to the club more often because I felt so good about myself when I was there.  Everyone is so positive, friendly, and non-judgmental. I felt so welcomed and comfortable every time I would walk through the door.

During the challenges they were always talking about going to these "trainings" and meetings all the time and encouraged me to go.  I decided one Saturday to go to what they called an STS (Success Training Seminar).  I was sorely unprepared for what I was walking into.  The doors opened, loud music was blaring, and there was a line of people on each side of the door, clapping, high fiving, and greeting each of us as we walked in.  I thought to myself "What have I gotten myself into?".  These people were crazy!  They were dancing on their chairs, shouting, singing, and having a blast.  One thing was uniform, though...everyone in the room was clearly having a good time...and they were all smiling...genuine smiles.  They were happy to be there.  I listened as people one after another told their amazing stories of weight loss, getting healthy, and making an income.  Everyone was recognized for each achievement and I thought that was pretty cool.

Then they started talking about something they called "Extravaganza".  There were posters about it in the club, signs and fliers littered the walls and tables in the club, but I honestly didn't give it much thought.  It never would have crossed my mind to go all the way to Las Vegas, Nevada for a "training".  But then, my friend who had originally started with me started talking like she might go...that was the first I had even thought about it...the girls were all trying to talk us into going.  I asked my husband what he thought and he said "No way!" I wasn't shocked by that, but then I started listening to them talk about how exciting it was and how much fun they would have and I started REALLY wanting to go.  Not because I cared about what I might learn there, but because I didn't want to miss out on whatever fun they were going to have and have to listen to them talk about their adventures when they got back!  I was able to work it out so that I could go, so my friend and I hopped on a plane in late October 2011 and headed to Vegas.

I roomed with two other girls in Vegas and we really just expected a girls getaway and weren't in too big of a hurry to get to the first meeting on time.  We were late for it and ended up having to stand in the back of the room.  It wasn't until the next day that I realized how much information I was absorbing at this event.  I listened intently for the rest of the weekend and took notes, pictures, and really started getting interested more in the company.  By the end of the weekend I talked to Michelle to let her know that I had changed my mind about wanting to do the business and I decided to jump in when we got home.

November 1 was the day that I officially began being an Herbalife Independent Distributor.  I figured, if I could make an extra $500 a month, it would really help out with the "extra" things that always seem to pop up outside of our monthly budget.  My very first week, I pocketed $420.  I was shocked!  By the end of the month I had made $860 with very little effort working only a couple of hours a week.

To help boost our business, two friends and I decided to run our own Weight Loss Challenge.  We would start it the Wednesday after Thanksgiving.   Despite our advertising attempts and word of mouth, we weren't getting many people who wanted to sign up.  It was looking like we might have to call off the whole deal.

Thanksgiving Day 2011 came and I was with my family on our way to my Grandma's house for dinner.  I said to my husband..."I'm not talking about Herbalife today.  I don't want my family to think this is just one of my crazy attempts to lose weight.  I know they'll just make fun of me and think I'm crazy!" However, when I walked through the door, everyone stopped in their tracks.  It was a good feeling to know that everyone could see a difference in me.  I broke my "No Herbalife Today" vow because they all started asking me about it.  When I left that day, 11 of my family members were signed up for our Weight Loss Challenge.

My mom had decided to start on the products with me in October, but my dad thought it was crazy and said he would never do it.  However, after a shake party and tasting the shakes, he decided that he would give it a whirl as well.  My mom joined the challenge with my aunts, uncle, cousins, and siblings.  It was the best feeling to see them drop pounds and inches, reach their goals, and start feeling better.  Slowly, more people in our family have jumped on the bandwagon and as of this post, 26 relatives (that I know about) are taking Herbalife products.  It's been increasingly hard to keep track of everyone's weight loss, but the last time I figured it up (about a month ago) between those 26 people we have lost around 320 pounds since Thanksgiving.  Several of those have reached their goals for weight loss and have set new goals for fitness and health.  Some have shocked their doctors and even been taken off of medications for high blood pressure, diabetes, acid reflux, etc.

Since deciding to "do the business" I have been blessed to get to help so many people feel good, achieve goals, and learn to help even more people.  I am now making around $3,000 a month very part time around my kids and family schedule.  I have lost over 60 pounds and nearly 70 inches from my body.  I have dropped 5 clothing sizes (soon to be 6) and have never felt more amazing in my adult life!  I could spend another hour listing the benefits that I have received from this whole experience because it has changed my life entirely.

Most importantly, I have been able to reconnect with some old friends and distant relatives, my family is improving their health, and I have gained some new life-long friends in the past year that I can't imagine not having in my life.  I have learned so much about people, and about myself that I never would have discovered from my miserable spot on the couch.  The money, the fun, the trips, the "swag"...that is all secondary...a bonus if you will.  I've said it before and I'll say it again...if I never received a dime or any recognition or any type of payment for this, I would still do it...a hundred more times.  I have gained so many valuable things outside of all of those things that have made it worth every second of the time I've spent.

I have also grown so much in my Spiritual life.  Since waking up from my self-imposed misery, I have learned to be thankful in all things.  I have realized how very blessed that I am.  I know for a fact that God had a hand in me making the phone call that day.  It saved my life.  I drove past the sign the next day and it was no longer there.  I think all the time about where I would be today had I not made that phone call.  It scares me to even  entertain the thought for a second.  It also makes me laugh to see that God does have a sense of humor.  In all of my prayers for purpose, I never would have imagined in a million years that I would be taken on a journey from a morbidly obese couch potato to a Wellness Coach.

Today, while I'm still not (and probably never will be) a morning person, I embrace each day and try to make the most out of it.  I have so much more energy than I could have imagined.  Mondays are now my favorite day of the week (I know! I must be joking!) I love spending time with my family and I love that I am now an Operator at Vibe.  My journey has only just begun.  I still have quite a way to go to reach my personal goals, but for the first time in my life I actually believe wholeheartedly that I will get there.  I can't wait to see what the future holds for me and this journey that I'm on.  Thank you for taking the time to read this and learn a little about my life.  May God bless all of you!